alicia bice

What does Self-Love mean to you?

Alicia Bice2 Comments

When you hear the words self-love, what does that mean to you? I feel like there are so many different interpretations to that and they are all right! It doesn’t mean one thing in particular, it means whatever you think it means. For me it means loving me for me. I have always struggled with caring what people think and that is what has always made me feel like I wasn’t good enough at anything I did. I don’t know if y’all read my New Year’s resolutions post, but I talked about my word of the year, enough. That is the word I chose to live by and work on for 2019. It is a word that has been on my mind for a few years now, and I finally decided it was time to realize that I AM ENOUGH. You are too! Yes you, the one reading this post. I know so many of us feel like we aren’t a good enough wife, daughter, mother, student, worker, blogger, whatever the case may be. I think it’s safe to say we have all been there. I can’t remember if I mentioned it in my last post talking about this word, but I want to just say that I did not have a bad childhood, my mom and dad never told me I wasn’t good enough or anything like that. I just care what people think, therefore I feel like I’m not good enough and don’t meet their expectations. I also do not have a bad life now, I have just always felt that way but I’m working on it.

I want to share something with y’all that my husband told me because it really made me stop and think and don’t tell him I said this, but he was right. Whenever I was talking about all this to him he said “it’s because you care what people think, just don’t care what people think.” I told him it was way easier said than done, and that’s when he hit me with his knowledge, he said “everyone is going to have their own version of you and you can’t be all those versions, so just be yourself and if they like you, they like you, if they don’t, they don’t. There is no way you can be every single version of you that people have in their head, so don’t even worry about it.” Those probably aren’t his exact words but hopefully you get the point. I have never thought of it like that and now having that mind set, it has really helped me a lot. There are times when I do care what people think, but I have gotten so much better!

With all of that being said, I want to just encourage each and every one of y’all to take even baby steps to loving yourself for who you are and to not care what people think, if this is something you struggle with. If you love yourself and how you are, that’s amazing! Please continue to love yourself and spread the self love to those still working on it!

One of my friends Tabatha was reading a book by Jordan Lee Dooley and she quoted something that has really stuck with me so I wanted to share it with y’all, “ if you wouldn’t say it to a friend, don’t say it to yourself.” I absolutely love that because we shouldn’t be talking about ourselves negatively, and we do it all the time, especially women. We are so hard on ourselves and pick ourself apart. If this is something you do, I challenge you to say something positive about yourself when you are about to complain about yourself. I also challenge you to tell a stranger she is beautiful, or has a cute outfit, or whatever it may be. I want us to spread more positivity and lift each other up instead of tearing each other down, which I feel is what women tend to do, which is so sad to me. You would think that since we know how it feels to be judged that we wouldn’t judge other women.

Last month I was actually able to participate in a photoshoot all about self-love and I am so thankful I was able to do it. Not only was the photoshoot fun, but the past few weeks I have been able to see everyone’s take on self-love. I will link everyones instagram down below if y’all want to check out what self-love means to them. If you follow me on Instagram they will be tagged on my self-love post there as well. Everyone who participated in the shoot are different shapes and sizes and have different careers, but we are all beautiful and have something different to bring to the world! That is another thing I want y’all to remember, it doesn’t matter what size you are, what you do, what your personality is, you are unique and have so much to offer the world! Be happy with your size, be happy with who you are. If you aren’t happy there are definitely ways to help with that. If you aren’t happy with your body try eating a little better and maybe start exercising. If you aren’t happy with your job maybe think about why and if your heart is somewhere else, go for that change. If people tell you you aren’t pretty, you should be a different size, you shouldn’t quit your job, you shouldn’t do this, you shouldn’t do that because of your age, DON’T LISTEN! If you want to do something or wear something don’t let anyone stop you. Do whatever makes you happy! I know a lot of things are easier said than done, but just take baby steps and try not to care what people think! Like I said before, this is definitely something I’m still working on as well.

In case you were wondering what made me write this post, it’s because I really want to add an “enough” movement to my business. I want to inspire and encourage you to realize that YOU ARE ENOUGH. I want to remember that I AM ENOUGH. Working in the beauty industry I hear probably at least once a day “I’m too old to wear that eyeshadow,” or “I’m too old to wear that color lipstick.” The first thing I ask is if they like the color and if they say yes I tell them who care what anyone thinks, wear it. What is even more sad is there was this beautiful girl shopping with someone, not sure the relation to the young lady, but she was looking for a concealer to help with her dark circles and the older lady that was with her told the girl that she needed more makeup, because she wouldn’t get a guy if she didn’t wear more makeup! I could not believe that was even said and that really made me mad and want to cry. First of all, you do not need to change for a man! If a man wants you to wear more makeup tell him to find a woman who wears more makeup. I don’t know her situation and I haven’t been in a situation like that before, but I would have said well I guess I won’t get a man. I just felt so bad for the girl and I hope it is not always like that, because I can’t imagine how that girl feels about herself. So that is another big reason I want to start this movement, for women who have been told they aren’t pretty or need more makeup or anyone who don’t feel good enough. YOU ARE!

I really hope y’all will join me in my movement and stay tuned for more things to come. I’ve been playing around with designs, so hopefully I will have some merchandise soon! I would love for y’all to comment below and let me know what self-love means to you! Also, keep scrolling to see some pictures from our photoshoot!

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Sarah, Tabatha, me, and Erika.
Yummy drinks made my the mobile bar Drink Knox.

Yummy drinks made my the mobile bar Drink Knox.

Delicious appetizers by Family Meal Chef!

Delicious appetizers by Family Meal Chef!

Family Meal Chef

Family Meal Chef

Loved these self-love cookies made by The Gourmet Cookie!

Loved these self-love cookies made by The Gourmet Cookie!

A special thanks to all these Knoxville businesses for being part of this special day! Click each name to visit their instagram!